The Best Big Sister

Towards the end of my pregnancy I started to think about how life was going to change for my little girl. We always planned to have multiple kids. Matt and I both have one sibling and I can't imagine life without a brother to share it with. That didn't make it any easier to think about how my little girl's world was going to be altered. She was no longer going to be the only one who needed my lap to sit in, my hand to hold or my attention to claim. I knew it was going to be good for her. It's a real world lesson in sharing and humbling yourself to allow others to be more than you (a very biblical principal, see Luke 14:7-11). She was going to have to give up her "place of honor" for a little man she didn't even know yet. I worried what her reaction would be and how I would have room enough in my lap (read: my heart) for two little ones.

I can tell you that there is room enough. My heart is twice as big now because I have twice as much love. I love these two kids equally and want, so much, to be the best mom for both of them. I will not always be able to provide them with equal time as their needs change and our lives adapt to new routines but they will always have equal love.

I must brag on my baby girl here and say that she has done a wonderful job of making herself lower so that Evan can have the front row seat for a time. Don't get me wrong, she's not perfect and she is three after all. But she has shown great love to her baby brother. She is constantly going to get toys for him to "play" with and a pacifier in case he cries. She always lets us know when he needs something. I even overhear her telling him that she loves him occasionally. Those words are music to a mother's ears. She has acted out against her father and myself because she wants more hugs and more one on one time but through it all she has not taken that out on her little brother. When I was pregnant many friends told me that Gracie would be so much bigger the instant I held Evan in my arms. Not only does she look bigger to me now; she acts bigger too.

They really do grow up too fast. Evan is one lucky little guy to have such a great big sister. I hope they grow up to be friends.

Note to Gracie:

I know you are having to sacrifice a lot of mommy and daddy time now to your little brother. I know you need more hugs and kisses and I am trying very hard to provide that for you. I am so proud of how you are growing up. I am so proud of how much you love your little brother. You will be good friends one day. You will laugh and share memories together and that will make me smile. :)