One Year

One year used to seem so long. As a kid it was an eternity. In high school it was endless until summer came. In college it started to speed up about the time when the serious decisions about my future needed to be made. After marriage it started to become hard to believe that it had already been a year and then two and then...

Then we had a baby. Years go by in what seems like the blink of an eye now. I wrote my last blog post about a year ago and although so much has changed it has gone by so fast.

We are a family of four now. The Lord saw fit to bless us with a beautiful baby boy. Evan Matthew Dean was born on November 9, 2011. He was 7 lbs 15 oz and 20.25 inches long. He is growing so incredibly fast and now (at three and a half months) weighs in at about 17 lbs! He is a content little guy and loves to lay out and watch the family living life around him. He squeals a lot and smiles so big. He makes this stretching face when I pick him up from a nap. He throws up his arms, draws his feet up, leans his head back and pushes out his lips. I love it so much. He has this way of looking at me with those beautiful brownish eyes when he is sitting on my lap after a feeding. He has his head down like it's just too heavy to hold up and then he lifts just his eyes to meet mine and grins so big that my heart feels like it might explode from all the love it has for him. For Gracie. For my little family.

I am so tired. I am so overwhelmed. I am so grateful. I am so blessed. I am so wishing that this year does not fly by so quickly. That this year I can be a great mom to the two little people the Lord has entrusted to me. That I can take time to enjoy the little moments that make this job great and that the little moments that make it hurt will pass quickly and not linger. That this year I can lean on the One who created motherhood and know His plans are great.

Not to Evan:

I love you little man. More than you will probably ever know. I am sorry that you are already experiencing the second child syndrome in the form of fewer photos, less blog posts, and a really exhausted mommy. But I am not sorry that you have a big sister who adores you, that the important moments are etched into my mind if not a photo and that you have made my heart grow with love so abundant that I can't imagine our family without you. Grow slowly little man. You will be big before we know it. :)